Mel Gibson
23333 Palm Canyon Lane
Malibu, CA 90265-4956
Dear Governor Gibson,
Did you notice I called you "Governor" Gibson? I was just practicing.
The reason Im practicing calling you Governor Gibson is because theres a movement to draft you to overthrow the liberal heathen Arnold Schwarzenegger. Heres what Mike Spence, president of the California Republican Assembly said:
"He (you) seems to be more consistent with the Republican message."
Isnt that the truth?! For one thing, I can never understand what Schwarzenegger is saying, so how can I even know if hes consistent with the Republican message? I think an Australian would make a much better California governor than an Austrian! At least I could understand you half the time!
By the way, whats your favorite Governor Gibson movie of all-time? You probably think mine is Passion of the Christ, but its only my 5th favorite. Dont get me wrong--its a great movie. I especially like the scenes where Jesus is being tortured in slow motion. How did you make it so realistic? The special effects were amazing! The only problem is, I think you should have played Jesus. You look so much like Him! I know youre too old for the part, but youd be amazed what they can do with make-up these days.
But my favorite Governor Gibson movies of all-time were Lethal Weapon I-IV. Remember when Sgt. Riggs (you) pretended he was the Three Stooges and said "Whoop, whoop," and poked the bad guys in both eyes with two fingers? If you ever make a sequel to Passion of the Christ, you should play Jesus and do that to the Romans. It might help lighten things up.
Also, when youre Governor Gibson, do you think youll execute Tookie Williams? The reason I ask is, I think the liberal heathen Arnold Schwarzenegger is going to wimp out and let him live. Thats the trouble with the liberals! They dont understand this country was founded on Christian principles! They never stop and think about what Jesus would want us to do, like say "Merry Christmas" and torture terror suspects and execute Tookie Williams!
Put Jesus back where He belongs! In the California governors mansion! And if the liberal heathen Arnold Schwarzenegger doesnt like it, just say, "Whoop, whoop," and poke him in both eyes!
Sincerely,
Carl Estrada
P.S. I want to be the first to contribute to the Mel Gibson for Governor campaign. Heres a quarter. I pledge to send you a quarter every month until youre governor!