Tuesday, July 15, 2003
Scott McLellan
White House Press Secretary
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Ave.
Washington, D.C. 20500
Dear Mr. McLellan,
Welcome on board! Ari Fleisher got out just in time, didn’t he? Do you think he knew President Bush would get caught “exaggerating the truth” and that’s why he decided to leave?
I’m afraid with the Demos and the press smelling blood, your “honeymoon period” is going to be short. But if anyone is up to the job, it’s you! I’ve been watching Ari Fleischer for a long time and I’m a bit of an “afficionado.” Since you’re brand new on the job, I thought I’d give you a sample of how to field the “tough questions”:
Wolf Blitzer: Mr. McLellan, how does the president answer the critics who say he exaggerated the truth?
McClellan (you): Wolf, the president is very clear when he unequivocally means to words in no uncertain terms stands behind the veracity of his statement Saddam Hussein brutal dictator we will not tolerate terror Saddam Hussein 9/11 protect the world from evil 9/11 Saddam Hussein.
Britt Hume: Mr. McLellan, how did the president allow those 16 words to get into his speech?
McClellan (you): That’s a good question, Britt. You have to look at the context in which the State of the Union weapons of mass destruction will be found Saddam Hussein this was one isolated piece of the entire intelligence puzzle when you look at its entirety it is clear that Saddam Hussein was a brutal dictator who had to be Saddam Hussein stopped because he was 9/11 a menace to the entire world.
If you use these answers, you’ll do fine! By the way, my favorite White House Press Secretary of all time is CJ Craig on The West Wing. Who’s yours?
Sincerely,
Carl Estrada
The political humor and political satire on this site is written by Paul Chasman. To sign up for the email list, view archives, and see the latest installments, check back regularly to our home page.