Tuesday, October 14, 2003
Attorney General John Ashcroft
U.S. Department of Justice
950 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW
Washington, DC 20530-0001
Dear Attorney General Ashcroft,
I just got back from the dentist (don’t worry--it was just a routine cleaning), and they gave me a form to sign. They called it the Health Information Portability and Accountability Act (HIPAA). My hygienist was getting a little testy because she was waiting to clean my teeth but I insisted on reading the whole thing (I always read every word of what I sign--you never know what they might sneak in), and sure enough on page 2 in small print, under the heading: National Security, it said: “We may disclose to authorized federal officials health information required for lawful intelligence, counterintelligence, and other national security activities.” (Italics mine.)
Silly me! A few months ago when I unleashed Operation Full Disclosure, I mobilized people to submit their records on reading material, videos, and CD’s they had purchased, but it never occurred to me you would need our medical records, too. Rest assured that all good Americans with nothing to hide will be happy to give you their complete medical history, thus saving you countless hours of having to dig it up.
Please bare with me--it will take me time to rummage through all my medical files. But to get us started--today I had my quarterly teeth cleaning. I go three times a year because my gums collect an unusual amount of plaque. I have very few cavities--good teeth, bad foundation. The hygienist took x-rays and found no problems. She measured my gum pockets and they were all 2 mm’s (millimeters) in front, 3 & 4 mm’s as we got back toward the molars. That’s not bad--they’ve been as deep as 5 & 6 mm’s in the past. She said I was bleeding a little more than last time, and lectured me to use my Sonicare electric tooth brush more. My dentist, Dr. Lipman examined my teeth and reminisced about Lake Tahoe while my mouth was wide open.
That’s about all I can tell you off the top of my head. I’m happy to do whatever I can to help America fight its War on Terrorism so I’ll send all my medical records. I remember the last procedure I had was a colonoscopy. They took pictures--I’ll try to find them for you.
Sincerely,
Carl Estrada